Shrinking audiences

Yesterday I heard a MAJOR personality on a HUGE station tell the audience that he had a Jay-Z freestyle that was causing controversy, but he didn't want to play it on the air: instead, listeners had to go to the station's website to hear the track.  

With radio companies pushing traffic to the web, are they cheating the on-air product just to generate web numbers?  

I thought on air "content is king"!!!  I would think that you would create on-air content and use the web for: "in case you missed the new song from..." or "this artist just cussed out our morning show host, in case you missed it: go to our site..."  

MORNING SHOW SHAME

It's a shame that companies pay sooo much $$$ for morning shows, and then the talent on the shows don't continue to provide FABULOUS CONTENT daily.  If you are on the AM Show making 6 or 7 figures, please-please-please hire producers and talent that will make you shine!  

• If you are not funny, hire most naturally funny person you can find and let them be funny on your show!
  
• If you are a guy who likes to talk sports, women and beer; hire a strong female side-kick to keep you honest!  (Howard Stern is the obvious person to reference)
• If you are wild, fun and very energetic; hire someone who will take care of the commercial logs, reading sponsorships, etc.
• If you are a celebrity in your own right (i.e. you've been on TV, in movies, etc.), use your celebrity status to have the hottest celebrities on your show every day!  Why do you think people watch "Dancing with the Stars," why they go to tmz.com, and why they TiVo "Access Hollywood"???  Because the audience loves to hear about and see celebrities on TV, on-line and yes...ON THE RADIO!

Lastly, don't get soooo big and soooo rich that you don't spend time where your listeners are, doing the things that they do, eating at the restaurants where they eat.  Listeners need to feel like you can identify with them and their problems and visa/versa.  

P.S. The PPM is showing that the PM Drive audience is as big, if not bigger than the AM Drive. In 2 years, your PM Drive host might be swapping checks with you... but not if you content is better than his/hers.

$YNDICATED $HOW$ CO$T TOO MUCH CA$H!

All those 30 second spots add up.  How much are you really paying for that mix show or countdown show??? Programmers used to be able to argue that the content on a nationally syndicated show was worth 4 minutes an hour in inventory (4 minutes at $200 a minute = $800; if the show is a three hour show, then the cost is $2400 a week!!!).  Not anymore!

You can get the best mix show on Earth, hosted by a funny, witty, entertaining personality for $0!  NO CASH, NO BARTER!  

SMASHTIME RADIO IS THE FUTURE!  GET FAMILIAR!!!

Books on tape

If your audience is listening to books on tape instead of listening to your show, then you do not have enough compelling content!

WINNER PLAYBACK

OK radio professionals... if you are still playing back the entire conversation between yourself and a contest winner, then you need to go back to broadcasting school or learn how to use Shortcut or Adobe Audition!  How very UNentertaining and not interesting is it to hear a caller ask if he/she can pick up the prizes at your station and then the jock gives the address along with a parting "thanks for listening..."?!?!?!  

Editing should be your favorite thing when you are on the air on a music station.  You have the chance for every interaction with every caller to be perfect: perfectly timed and delivered!  If you don't like it when your voice cracked when you were reading the client's tag, then you can go back and re-do it!  Imagine if Tom Brady could call for a re-do after throwing an interception!!! The Pats would have won the Super Bowl!  You can win the Super Bowl of radio (i.e. your local Arbitron ratings) if you EDIT YOUR CALLERS!  Obviously, if you are doing a live talk show or a live morning show, this bit of advice doesn't apply (but please keep your finger on the dump button, it could save your job and the PD a trip to the doctor to have his ulcers repaired!).

Try your best to be perfect... every break, every day!  You are a professional: it's expected!!!

If you are perfect 99% of the time, then when you do mess up (even if it's a big flub) you'll get a break from your PD and even more importantly... from your listeners!!!

AIR CHECKS

O.K.  If you read the last entry and you know that the writing is on the wall, then you need to get your air-check together!  

Here are ten air check tips to help you land your BIG gig:

1. Do not open the air check with a "show intro."  Most show intros are too long and too much about the personality for PD's to care to hear them!  A morning show co-host in Chicago almost didn't get her first commercial radio gig with me because her intro was NOT HOT!  Fortunately for her, she was VERY persistent and made me sit through her full air check...  She got the job with me and is now doing very well in the Windy City!
2. Make sure your BEST break is first!  This is the BEST break of your life!  Don't save it for last!  I'm not going to listen to the fourth minute of your air check if you didn't grab my attention in the first thirty seconds.  I want to hear your personality and charisma in the first minute: if you don't sound interesting or compelling on your first break, your second break probably won't be heard!
3. A great voice doesn't get you a gig!  Don't try to use a "radio voice," just be yourself.  Listeners want personalities who are real and someone they can relate to on the air on a daily basis.
4. If you do something remarkable on your show but it's not a "typical break," include it towards the end of the air check!  If you impress me enough for me to listen to five minutes of your air check, I'll be impressed by your attempt at creativity... not to mention if the bit is KILLER, then you'll definitely get an interview!
5. Be ready to have your air check and an unscoped show available on CD OVERNIGHT DELIVERY or by MP3 IMMEDIATELY.  In 2008, a PD will not wait around for five days to have your package delivered by the post office.
6. Make your package STAND OUT!  The PD will get between 20 and 100 resumes made on Word (same look, same feel).  Do something to make the PD say "WOW!"  I once received a package from a talent with a branded mouse pad, a branded CD, and everything was custom packaged with the jock's pic, logo, etc.  This person got an interview and (because of her talent) a job with my station.
7. Give the PD several ways to reach you: via phone, text message, & email.  He/she will contact you by the method that is easiest for him/her.  If he/she hits you on email, don't expect for him/her to call you when you blow up his/her phone for a month straight.  (For the OM's/PD's reading this, at least send an email to acknowledge receipt of some one's package!  It is rude and VERY arrogant to never recognize that someone has attempted to contact you!)
8. Do NOT send a picture of yourself unless the picture is very good!  Amateur or pictures taken by friends usually are not flattering.  If you send a picture, make sure it is taken by a pro.  When a PD sees you looking drunk, unkempt, sloppy, etc., he/she imagines you looking the same way at an appearance with the station's top client.  Like the saying goes, you only have one chance to make a first impression!
9. Do not give the PD the link to your myspace or facebook, unless it has been "cleaned up" for professional eyes.  You never know how a prospective employer will perceive your website, your friends, your choice of music, etc.  Don't give him/her the chance to make an impression about you until he/her meets you in person.
10. Don't give up!  If you really think you are qualified for a job at a great station in a town you want to live in, follow up on your package by email and/or phone until you get a definite answer from the OM/PD.  A lot of times, persistence does pay off (see number one of this list)!
    

Good Luck!!!

WHEN MANAGEMENT SAYS...

When management tells you to stop doing a "show" and says to only "follow the format," then it is time to get your air-check and resume together!

Any VP's of Programming, OM's, PD's, etc who are reading this...

If you have jocks on air who you feel shouldn't be creative and do a "show," then that person probably shouldn't be on your station!